Choosing child care is one of the biggest decisions a family makes, and the option you pick shapes more than just your schedule—it shapes the kind of care your child receives day to day. In this article, we look at how different child care options can impact your child, with a focus on the “individualization” of each choice. We also take a few moments to address a common worry many parents have about peer socialization.
If you’re still weighing your options, it helps to understand both the different types of child care available and the costs that come with each. For more on the costs of each option, see our guide on how to afford a nanny.
To read the blog post by Certified Parenting Coach, Beaven Walters about “Do Young Children Need Peer Interaction to Become Socialized?”, click here.
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Here’s a closer look at how each child care option affects the individualization of care for your child:
Individualization of child care
Based on what kind of child care option you choose for your family, that can definitely have an impact on the level of individualization of care.
Nanny care, of course, is going to be the most highly individualized type of care. Because you are the nanny’s employer, you get to decide exactly how that care happens.
You can decide the types of activities, the frequency, the types of outings and when those outings happen.
Most nannies don’t want to be micromanaged, and honestly, parents really don’t have the time to micromanage a nanny to decide all of these things.
Of course, you’re going to want to get a general sense of the things that are happening. Maybe your nanny keeps a daily log throughout the day so that you can be in touch with some of the things that they’ve done. But, more realistically you’re going to want to partner with a nanny who is in alignment with either your parenting style, or child care philosophy, or at least someone who’s going to be able to honor your choice of parenting styles.
When you have a nanny, not only do you receive highly individualized child care, but you also get some help around the house.
Typical child care duties for nannies are anything related to the child. In addition to general care and safety of the child, they could be overseeing and helping out with the child’s laundry, with any snack meal prep, any dishes that they’ve used, they will be of course tidying those throughout the day, maybe organizing the room or play space, helping to keep things clean such as the high chair, or maybe the floor if you have a child who is just learning how to feed themselves. They can create quite a mess!
So, anything like that’s directly related to the care of the child, any of those things are going to be standard nanny duties.
What about peer socialization if we decide to work with a nanny?
One thing that parents struggle with when they are opting for child care and this usually happens with parents of toddlers on up is, are my children or is my child going to miss out on peer interaction and good socialization opportunities if they stay home with a nanny?
Now, you might think that group care is a really great way to do this and of course, it is! But we actually tapped into the resources and knowledge of parenting coach Bevin Walters, and she says “No, actually young children don’t need peer socialization to become socialized individuals”.
It’s a really interesting read and it kind of goes against what our intuition might be. So, make sure you check that article out—it’s really fascinating. Click on the link above so that you can learn more about that, especially if that’s a worry of yours. We think it will put your worries to rest.
A nanny share is going to be the next most highly individualized type of child care.
With a nanny share, the nanny’s attention is split between the children in their care. But, you still have quite a bit of say as the nanny’s employer as to how that care happens. Again, the types of activities, if it’s really important that the child get outdoors rain or shine, you can definitely have that on the to-do list, anything like that.
So yes, they are splitting attention but also you get to say exactly how that care happens, and you get to work very closely with your nanny to make sure that everything is happening in the way that you expect or you would like.
Family or friend care may be the next most highly individualized type of care but that’s going to vary quite a bit.
If it’s an arrangement where your friend maybe has their own child, it might depend on what they need to get done throughout the day and basically this sort of arrangement can have a high degree of variation.
Of course, if a family member is providing care, you’re going to have a high degree of trust. Maybe you’ll hand it off to that family member, but you still can have a say in how that care happens, what types of things you would like to have done, activities, outings, that sort of thing.
But again, this is going to have quite a bit of variation depending on your exact arrangement.
Now, the least highly individualized type of child care is going to be in a daycare or other type of care center.
This is because children are in a larger group and often these types of places have curriculum, they have activities and kind of a schedule throughout the day, a lot of them like to start with circle time, or do some storytime in the morning, or some sensory bin play.
But, what you’re going to want to do is you’re going to want to find a care center that is kind of in alignment with your philosophies. Maybe your family is very play-based, or you just love to get outdoors at any opportunity and have kids learn in nature, look for an outdoor or play-based care center.
Again, the care is not going to be as individualized as it might be with some of the other child care options listed previously. But, you’re still going to be able to have some degree of individualized care based on the style of care center that you’re able to choose.
Within a care center, when you tour that center you’re going to want to make sure that staff seems happy and highly engaged, you’re going to want to learn about disciplinary protocols, that sort of thing so that you can get a good sense for and be comfortable with the style of care that’s happening within that care center.
One thing to note, during the COVID-19 pandemic a lot of families opted to not be in care centers in order to minimize their exposure risk.
It’s worth pointing out that, just in sheer numbers, children likely do have more risk by being out and about and around other children and other staff members.
Many care centers do a fantastic job—kids are masked, and they have adopted more stringent cleaning and health protocols, that sort of thing. So, while it may be that with sheer numbers care centers can have a higher risk of exposure for COVID-19, you can minimize that, of course, with individualized nanny care in your own home or a nanny share. At the end of the day, the care centers are doing a fantastic job.
As you can see, the right child care option comes down to balancing the level of individualization you want with the needs and philosophy of your family. Whichever direction you choose, understanding how each option shapes your child’s day will help you make the decision that’s right for you.